August 2 was Anders' birthday. Somehow a year has managed to pass us by. I truly don't know how this happened. Anders was that little baby that rocked my world. Obviously we expected that life change with Casen who changed my life by giving my the forever title of "Mom", but the change that occurred in me when Anders was born was quite unexpected. I just assumed that we were adding another number to our family. Rounding it out. Making our family more "legit", so I was surprised when he drastically changed my life by his entrance to this world. My pregnancy was "easy", my labor and birth experience just as much so, but man he turned my life upside down on August 2, 2012. I remember looking at him late one night in the hospital and thinking, "Oh my gosh, this is real life. I am now a mother of TWO." I kept repeating it to myself, as if I hadn't had 9 months to get it to sink in. Of course it didn't, as big things in my life rarely do. (Darn you, Depersonalization.) Even then I still wasn't aware of how much weight that carried.
Since bringing Anders home from the hospital, I have been humbled in so many ways. Casen was a very easy baby in regards to how much attention he needed, but Anders was another story. He was completely dependent on me for comfort, since I was (and still am?!?!) strictly nursing and we co-slept, so he grew to be very mommy-centric. It was like being a new mom all over again. We had to use all new tactics and strategies with this one. (So funny how that works.)
All this to say, Anders has made me realize what is most important to me, and that is my children and my family. His arrival has caused me to look deeper behind what I truly want deep down for me and my family. He helped push me to learn how to follow through and make changes that I know need to be made. He kinda put the stamp on my future in the sense that he helped me realize, "Hey, this IS real life." My life. My babies, my boys, my responsibility, my passion, my joy, my everything. So with the birth of Anders not only did we welcome his new life, but mine as well. For that I will forever have a special place in my heart for him and these lessons I have learned since he joined our family.
Happy belated birthday baby boy. <3
I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always.
As long as I'm living,
my baby you'll be.